All Hail King Who?
by NotQuiteBerserk
Summary: When the point is raised that putting a sword into a stone is much more impressive than pulling one out some changes are made to the royal family. Utterly random. Oneshot. No slash.


**SPOILER WARNING END OF SERIES 3. I apologise for the sheer weirdness of this, it was mostly written at a time that was defiantly past midnight on my phone (I really have to find a different cure for insomnia) only the ending was written at a decent time off day so there's no excuse for that, sorry…**

**Oh and FYI this was inspired by **_**Terry Pratchett's: Men at Arms**_** (if you've read it you know what I mean, if you haven't don't worry)**

"Nah, it's not that impressive, I mean, pulling a sword from a stone is all well and good but all the hard work's already been done. You want the guy who put it in there in the first place"

There was an awkward silence as approximately half of the population of Camelot looked expectantly at the man they had been about to crown king. The random voice had a point, and it seemed like Arthur couldn't think of a counter argument, instead he turned to face the crowd

"Does anyone know who it was that placed this sword in the stone?"

There are some who would call the prince (although how long he would remain royalty was debatable) blind to some of the obvious facts around him, particularly those concerning the one and only Merlin, but to be fair to our dear Arty, he did notice the way his servant suddenly appeared to be a lot more awkward than he had been a minute ago. "Merlin, do you want to share with the class?"

"Ah, well err sire, the thing is, I..."

"Merlin! Either you can spit it out now or you can spend a day or so in the stocks" when Merlin still appeared to be tongue-tied he added a sharp "well?" for good measure.

Merlin muttered something almost inaudible whilst giving the laces of his boot more scrutiny than they'd had since they were made.

"Merlin, either speak up or you'll be on stable duty for a week"

"I did it, I put the sword in the stone." his voice was barely loud enough to carry to the first rows of the audience, but the few who heard gasped (and then of course it was only a matter of time before people started asking 'what did he say?' in supposed whispers, which seemed to carry a lot further than Merlin's mutter ever could) and the news flew through the citizens of Albion faster than a griffin on a speed boat.

It wasn't long before everyone was looking at Merlin (well, almost everyone, there was one person who had not quite heard the newest rumour, he eventually got fed up in the end of not being able to get a straight answer from anyone and went home. If anyone is really interested he later went on to invent some remarkable devices for the aid of hearing and died a very rich man, but I digress...) it was as though they expected the manservant to say something momentous but he seemed to be enjoying staring at the ground. He only looked up when the entirely unexpected (but perhaps inevitable) cry of "all hail King Merlin! Long live the king!" started from somewhere in the centre of the crowd.

It was several hours later that Merlin managed to get a word in edgeways between the overexcited crowd and Arthur's annoyed huffs of disapproval. "As King of this land" (the crowd gave a cheer) "I hereby name Arthur Pendragon as my successor and abdicate the throne" the crowd booed for a moment, then as Merlin handed the crown to Arthur with a flamboyant bow they seemed to come around to the idea and cheered wildly. (crowds become more fickle as they increase in size, and seeing as this one was made up of almost the entire population of Camelot they were quite happy with the change in command, Arthur looked better in a crown anyway)

It was a few weeks later that Merlin found Arthur in a field surrounded by chipped shards of rock and twisted pieces of metal that might formerly have been swords. "I don't understand Merlin" (he was still dreadful at walking quietly) "you're weaker than a girl, how in all of Albion did you manage it?"

There was a glitter in Merlin's eyes that Arthur had rarely seen before as he prepared to answer, after all the truth was far overdue after all these years. It was time finally for the pri- king to know that he had "_magic"_

**It feels a bit wrong to be posting this at this time (riots), I live in Watford which is just outside London and I've heard about five different theories as to whether or not we're at risk, all within the last couple of hours. It goes without saying that I hope we don't get hit, and my deepest sympathies go out to those who have been harmed by the senseless violence over the last few days.**


End file.
